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2017 WENDY CORREEN SMITH. Powered by Blogger.


The Pink Church

When Magnolia & I are out shopping I always have to stop to shake up the snow globes for her. Her face lights up with excitement & to see the wonder in her eyes is such a blessing. 

Yesterday we stopped to look at all the snow globes on the end cap of a Target Christmas aisle. First I grabbed the ballerina and played the Nutcracker Waltz for her, then I shook up the carousel and watched her gaze at all the falling snow.

Then I showed her one with a blue chapel and pastel pink & mint trees. The song it played was O Holy Night. She laughed a sweet laugh and wrinkled up her nose as she squinted her eyes. I could tell this one was her favorite.

As I was looking at her, my sweet daughter, memories of my prayers for her in a pastel pink church in Santa Barbara came flooding back. Here she was in a Target grocery cart holding this snow globe with a baby blue church & time stood still for a moment. I was taken back to that day, it was my 35th birthday. I knew our IVF transfer was the next month, and that we only had one embryo frozen waiting for us. The faith I had in my heart was richly running through my soul, despite the fact that odds for success were very much against us. I believed with every part of me that God was going to send us a child. Not to say I didn't have fear, oh I certainly did. I somehow washed it away over & over again with my faith. There she was, straight from Heaven, answered prayers.

The holiday season is about joy & wonder, and yet, I know there are so many out there hurting. I have friends that have recently lost parents, others that have been diagnosed with cancer, & some that have children & babies fighting illnesses.

My story of faith was preceded by a Christmas season that was full of fear & pain, both physical & emotional. My greatest blessings, Ryan & Magnolia, the two that gave me the family that I always dreamed of, were preceded by a painful divorce & a surgery that led us to IVF. The year before I had lost my grandma & the holiday season would never be the same without her.

While I am in this season of delight & making everything I can merry & joyful, I must stop for a moment to pray for the ones that are hurting. I realize that there is a silent pressure to be happy despite the real life events that may be taking place during the months of November & December. I know that sadness & heartache don't just disappear because it's the holiday season. It's not always like the Hallmark movie, although I do know that God's love is always present & there is purpose to the pain.

In my own life, I think I can honestly say that out of the deepest pain has come the strongest conviction of the presence of God and the love of God. - Elisabeth Elliot

I read this the other day & thought how appropriate it is for the holiday season. I am all about finding the silver lining in life & I want to find the festive in everything. I want Magnolia's memories of the holiday season to be full of family traditions that evoke all things merry. On the same note, this moved me & got me thinking about life and the pressures to always be happy.

“I actually attack the concept of happiness. The idea that – I don’t mind people being happy – but the idea that everything we do is part of the pursuit of happiness seems to me a really dangerous idea and has led to a contemporary disease in Western society, which is fear of sadness. It’s a really odd thing that we’re now seeing people saying “write down 3 things that made you happy today before you go to sleep”, and “cheer up” and “happiness is our birthright” and so on. We’re kind of teaching our kids that happiness is the default position – it’s rubbish. Wholeness is what we ought to be striving for and part of that is sadness, disappointment, frustration, failure; all of those things which make us who we are. Happiness and victory and fulfillment are nice little things that also happen to us, but they don’t teach us much. Everyone says we grow through pain and then as soon as they experience pain they say “Quick! Move on! Cheer up!” I’d like just for a year to have a moratorium on the word “happiness” and to replace it with the word “wholeness”. Ask yourself “is this contributing to my wholeness?” and if you’re having a bad day, it is.” – Hugh Mackay

No matter where you are in life, may the light of this Christmas season fill your heart with peace.

Merry Christmas xo

A few of our favorite snow globes are linked below.

Wendy Correen Smith
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