Four Years

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Words)

Four years ago today we had the most beautiful outdoor wedding. It was 74 degrees and sunny with a light breeze. The pink & blue cotton candy sky at dinner was painted by the Heavens above. It was a fairytale. More than magical; difficult for me to even put into words.

For the past four years since we have looked at our weather app every single day leading up to our wedding date to see what the weather will be like on our anniversary. One year it was incredibly hot, the next two years it was cold, and this year it says severe afternoon thunderstorms!

Last night we were talking about the weather forecast for 10/10/19 & Ryan said "we were IDIOTS!" and I couldn't help but laugh. We were, we planned a day for all of our friends & family months in advance counting on a gorgeous October day. It could have gone so wrong & we would have lost a lot of money. Instead, we took this leap of faith together with no idea how it was going to turn out & of course we prayed & we prayed & we prayed for it to be beautiful. And it was! I cannot think of one thing that went wrong that day. Not one. Breezy, sunny, 74 degrees with sprinkles of Heaven in all of the details.

Sometimes I think, how did we get so lucky? Soon after we got married we took another huge leap of faith to do IVF. We had one single embryo. ONE! My eyes are tearing up now to think about how much faith we had in that embryo. Our hearts were all in & we loved that ball of frozen cells like it was our baby. Odds & statistics would have told us to be prepared for failure. We should have been ready for broken hearts, but we fell to our knees instead. The fact that our first round of IVF gave us our Magnolia is quite remarkable. And there isn't a day that passes that we don't thank God for our greatest gift.

We've had heartache too. I lost my grandma the weekend Ryan had planned to propose. We had to make a very difficult decision to let our furbaby Mrs. PB go to Heaven. Only a month later I miraculously, & against all odds got pregnant naturally the weekend of Magnolia's first birthday, only to lose the baby on Easter Sunday at 10 weeks pregnant. Ryan's grandpa passed away one year ago this month. This past year hasn't been the easiest & we've had things going on that have caused us both stress. We've shed tears & we've fought about silly things. Social media & my blog only share the most beautiful of times. Only occasionally do I sit down & share the struggles.

Through it all we've grown closer. We have a bond that allows us to understand one another when words aren't spoken (that was actually a gift from the very beginning), we can laugh together even after a fight, we talk things out & communication + understanding is always a priority. I still remember the days I prayed for all that I have now. A loving & kind husband, a beautiful daughter, & our fluffy Valentine.

Maybe we are "idiots" because we have this shared joy of taking big leaps of faith. We hold hands & dive into new things together not knowing what is going to happen, but believing in miracles with faith in our hearts. Thanking God today & everyday for my happily ever after, for my best friend, & for the man that jumps all in to life's crazy adventures with me.